Saar Credit Card Saar

Some of the smartest answers I have seen people dealing with unsolicited calls for ‘sir free credit card sir,’ ‘sir, personal loan sir,’ ‘exclusive offer for only you sir,’ and other such calls:

Phone rings. Sir, xxx bank is offering personal loan upto xxx on unbelievable terms. Ok I am interested. Can you give me the details. Yada yada yada yada. Fine I also want to know about payments. Blah blah blah blah. Ok, ill take it. Smart choice sir, if you will help me with a few details, what is your name and where do you work? Oh, I thought you knew. I am unemployed and that is why I needed the loan. That person to date has not got a call from the bank again.

Phone rings. Female voice offers life-time free credit card with lowest interest rate in market, friendliest repayment options, exclusive discounts/offers on using the card. Great, that is exactly what I need. Thank you sir, if you can give me some personal details. Actually this is my office phone and I cant use it long, so can you come over to my place tonight at about 9 pm to complete the affair? No further calls.

Phone rings. Sir, I have a exclusive offer for limited period on a car/house/personal loan and if you take it now you will benefit by yada yada blah blah . Really, what luck I needed a loan desperately and which bank are you calling from? Sir, from xxx bank. You should have told me earlier, the state general manager is a chaddi buddy of mine yaar and how come he never told me about this, I’ll call and ask … hello? Hello?

Phone rings. Sir, we have an offer for a lifetime free…. Excuse me, but which bank are you calling from? Oh sorry sir, I am calling from xxx bank. Oh ok, and what did you say your name was? Sir, this is xxx. Ok, xxx thanks for the details and you and your bank can expect a call from TRAI authorities soon for an explanation on why you called me when my number is on the do-not-disturb list.

Till date, no further calls...

8 comments:

Sal said...

Hi Ace:
One technique I used:
Phone rings.
"Sir, xxx bank is offering personal loan upto xxx / free credit card."
"Ok if you insist."
"Yada yada yada yada."
"Fine."
"Blah blah blah blah."
"Ok, I will take it just for you. But I want you to know I will not be repaying the loan/card balance."
"Sorry sir?"
"I said I am taking the loan/card. So you should not expect me to repay also."
"Sir, but.."
"Come on, I did not ask for it. You call me and offered. So I am already doing a favour for you by taking it. Now dont expect me to repay."
"..silence.. hangs up."
Cheers,
Salil

Ace of Spades said...

@ salil - that is a good one. should try that sometime as well.

THUDL said...

ha ha......some things to try in my free time.....but there is one trick that always works......well atlest for me it does....cause its the truth......tell em your a student...it must be a call center no no word or something..... works like a charm!:)

Ace of Spades said...

@ THUDL - now if only i had known earlier that it was as easy as one word. tks vivek, will try that :)

Shuv said...

erm...scenario 2 u mentioned..actually turned out to be an 'episode' when the lady in question actually agreed to come down to my place and meet me...a good couple of hours is costing me 27k a year in LIC premium.

Rohith said...

Even better option...
Phone rings.
'Hello?'
'Hello, sir. I'm calling from blah blah blah bank and we want to offer you blah blah blah...'
'Uh...Me no speak...English. Parlez-vous Francaise?'
Silence.
End of call.

Ace of Spades said...

@ Shuv - think of all the tax you are saving. was that not worth it? :)

@ Rohith - i need to take some French classes form you monsieur :)

ghetufool said...

the second one could have landed you in jail jackass.